Comparison of our two translations

OUR TRANSLATION
C
Remember the baths that killed you

I woke up with this marble head in my hands
that exhausts my elbows and I don't know where to
put it.

It was falling into the dream as I was coming out of the dream
that's how our lives united and it will be hard to
separate again.

I look at the eyes; neither open nor closed
I speak to the mouth that is constantly attempting to speak
I hold the cheeks that project from the skin.
I don't have any more strength;

my hands disappear and return
severed.


TRANSLATED BY EDMUND KEELEY AND PHILIP SHERRARD
3.
Remember the baths where you were murdered

I woke up with this marble head in my hands;
it exhausts my elbows and I don't know where to
put it down.

It was falling into the dream as I was coming out of the dream
so our life became one and it will be very difficult
for it to separate again.

I look at the eyes : neither open nor closed
I speak to the mouth which keep trying to speak
I hold the cheeks which have broken through the skin.
That’s all I’m able to do.

My hands disappear and come towards me
mutilated.